first, remember to delete, nothing is important, next, when in doubt, hide, no one knows if you are really there anyway, third, bcc people you barely know, this keeps life interesting, forwarding messages is also a good idea, especially if they are attached, to you, or, if you have an attachment, don’t forget technology is a tool and it doesn’t exist at all if you don’t look at it, close your eyes, never open your computer or phone, it might come out and scare you, or ask you questions, especially ignore the inbox, it really means outbox, like outhouse, spam goes to the bathroom, always send emails before 5am, shows you really care, trash happens, enjoy destruction, the space bar is never useful, shift doesn’t matter, hit return to before.