Freedom in Honduras (1993)

I’m in the back of the ‘71 Toyota Hilux, she’s sputtering up a muddy road, we are sweating, all 21 of us crammed together in compressed open air body odor. The chicken has just escaped the brown withered hands of the woman across from me, as she desperately clutches six other cluckers. We are doing about 20 going uphill, the chicken is on the metal edge about to jump to certain freedom and probably certain death. Por favor, ayuda! She calls out. I’m her last chance. I haven’t held a bird since I was six when my parents bought me a parakeet that I named Tweety (yes, highly original), but I don’t hesitate, lunge out to grab the poor bird by the neck. One motion, quick swing, and before the bird knows it, she is back with the others. The woman shares a toothless grin with me, her gringo hero of the moment.

This is every day in Honduras. If I don’t get a ride, I walk, I sing Jimmy Cliff to myself, I wait at crossroads, I throw rocks, I eat peanut butter, I walk, I sweat, I get picked up, I work for my ride, move wood, move rocks, move tiles, rides aren’t always free, but I’m free. No one is forcing me to do any of this. I have a vague schedule checking up on public health volunteers. Sometimes I show up in the middle of the night, soaked from thunderstorms, not a soul ever knows where I am, not even me. My bed is on my back, a Go Kot, I can assemble it in 4 minutes, can sleep anywhere, and do, on floors, in sheds, with fleas, near dogs, under farting people in hammocks, all true. By the end of summer, I’ve lost twenty pounds, light, agile, free.

After The Flip Phone

they radiate warmth, glow with a touch
they wake us up, send notifications, control calendars
they provide direction, share terrible text news
they are anxiety when lost
they are nothing, contain everything
they are addiction, mandatory for work
they are constantly held, gripped, stared at
they are photos, & more photos, preserving memory
they are low wage labor, somewhere in china
they are steve jobs, apple salaries supported
they are planned obsolescence, always updating
they are our servants, who we serve

Worker, Vagabond, Writer-All Three Are Me

and these things we do, over & over, wake up, turn off alarm, tuck sheets back in, look at face in mirror, shave on sundays, tuesdays, thursdays, cologne, two drops, deodorant, moisturizer, make black tea, you get the idea, routines, work week, commute, time spent just doing, not thinking, just doing, the opposite, no alarm, rise after the sun, brush teeth, or don’t, journey to fez, azrou, the atlas mountains, merzouga, listen to monkeys playing, wander into sahara, sandy sea, vast, empty, measure time in bus rides & adhan, watch others work, write about how busy everyone else is, take photos, try to understand, life is short, remember the dead, keep traveling from place to place, drink coffee, read a book, take a walk, meet a stranger, speak spanish, ride a moped, or sit in a room, write more & imagine, go nowhere except everywhere, pray to a god who listens, use your words, type, keep typing, life will end, but you were a witness, you were there.