what once was is all i think about, no, i don’t want world war 2 and the holocaust, and no, i don’t want to be drafted to vietnam, and the kennedys weren’t really that great, and jim crow was terrible, i don’t want polio, thank you jonas salk, there was no perfect time, what i’m talking about is technology and the speed of life, the environment, 24/7 internet television, tiktok addiction, the list is endless, the modern world is tough on someone who was born in the wrong year, i’m thinking it should have been 1955, not 1972, in 1955 tv was still new, american cars were still cool, food was less toxic, the planet wasn’t full on globally warming, and the dodgers and yankees had some epic baseball battles, the who could have been my first concert instead of the village people, as a kid i could still use a typewriter, and i could live for several decades with no email, no text messages, no cellphone, and i could have gotten lost more, remember when we used to get lost with real maps? i sound like an old curmudgeon, and i guess i’m getting there, but i look up and down san francisco streets and there are self-driving cars, motorized bikes speeding through red lights, people in tents, nothing seems to make sense, and shel silverstein isn’t alive anymore to help explain it to me, gosh bless his sarah cynthia sylvia stout, remember what happened? the whole pile of garbage just fell everywhere and destroyed everything, sometimes that feels like us right now, the 21st century collapsing into automation, artificially intelligent machine learning, humanity riding in the backseat, but tell them how you really feel dan, i still have hope, otherwise why teach? why be a parent? but something is off, it’s all just too fast, too digital, too many screens, can’t we just slow it down a little bit? take a deep breath, now one more, that’s a start.
Category: Writing
The Life & Death of North Beach, San Francisco
north beach has changed, the spontaneity is gone, we used to just go out, to shop at city lights bookstore, to eat, to have a drink, to be in the city together, listen to music, jazz, or whatever, the city used to be a community, no one really knew what might happen any given night, at vesuvio’s or caffe trieste, or on broadway, people being people, san francisco people, with their freedom and self-expression, the edifices remain, but the past is past, now they shop amazon online, order uber eats, reserve on opentable, scrutinize tripadvisor, calculate with gps, where to go and when, the city has had a partial death, and no one really cares, why go back to the old ways? we are now more and more, part of the machine, technology guides us, separates us from –lets just go out and be.
The Writing Process
watch a video of a guy living off the grid, collecting rain water, chopping wood, young man, happy to have his own chickens, question the modern world, read chaun webster poem, think, think, about repetition, repetition, chaun uses that, by way of entry, his fragment title, poem of the day, another place to start the process, reading, of course, look up random facts about centipede, the video game, came out in 1980, trust the screen is right, always question the screen, i wasn’t in the factory that made the game, another website says june 1981, consider writing about rehobeth beach and getting my initials onto a centipede screen, let that go, try writing about rent, that was a long time ago, now it is mortgage, home ownership, boring, boring, boring, repetition, take a break, think of nothing, give up, something arrives, start typing, keep it, delete it, can’t eat it, just words.
Last Words Of Ambrose Bierce
as to me, i leave here tomorrow for an unknown destination-ambrose bierce 1913, old writers never die, they just fade away, at least that’s how wikipedia says it happened, but what do we really know? stories replicate stories, screens duplicate screens, people pretend to know, and someone, somewhere, used to know something, bierce disappeared in mexico, that has been proven, but not by screens, rather, letters, paper, parchment, something that was held, not just screen seen, everyone has their secrets, even with all the camera phones, tracking cookies, and incessant internet, we all still get to have a little bit of bierce mystery, we all end up in an unknown destination, eventually.
How To Use A Microwave
first, only eat food raw, ideally just vegetables, fruits, nuts, that hot box will give you cancer, but if you must use it, push more than one button, the beeping sounds are soothing, if it says poke holes, stab with a fork, the plastic will succumb, if frozen, stare at what you will soon eat, looks like frozen february mud, mud is dirt, remember what your camp counselor said, god made dirt and dirt don’t hurt, enjoy the microwave glow, better than a sunset, hawaii on a kitchen counter, when it stops, rapidly consume, that is the whole point, life needs to be done quickly.
How To Commute On A California Highway
first, don’t get in your car, bike the 18 miles, you will never get there in time and that’s okay, second, stay in the right lane, but go at least 75, this scares cars getting on the freeway, but the thrill is worth it, if you must leave the right lane, do it quickly, stare at old toyota camrys, space out for several seconds, this was your high school ride, keep wishing you were younger, never turn on the radio, it interferes with your breathing, listen to your inhale/exhale, if a tesla is speeding (and they always are), drive nearby, they will get pulled over, not you, if you see an 18 wheeler, stay behind it, imagine that square as a canvas, what would banksy paint there? try to remember that each vehicle contains at least one human, they are really alive, you must protect them, this means checking blind spots and using a turn signal, whatever you do, don’t think too much, the asphalt and fluorescent lines don’t care, they’ve seen thousands of you.
How To Use Email
first, remember to delete, nothing is important, next, when in doubt, hide, no one knows if you are really there anyway, third, bcc people you barely know, this keeps life interesting, forwarding messages is also a good idea, especially if they are attached, to you, or, if you have an attachment, don’t forget technology is a tool and it doesn’t exist at all if you don’t look at it, close your eyes, never open your computer or phone, it might come out and scare you, or ask you questions, especially ignore the inbox, it really means outbox, like outhouse, spam goes to the bathroom, always send emails before 5am, shows you really care, trash happens, enjoy destruction, the space bar is never useful, shift doesn’t matter, hit return to before.
G.I. Joe Talks With A Therapist
i don’t know who i am anymore, i was once secure in my identity, government issue (g.i.) joe, a man who fights for his country, but i’ve learned too much, am i really just an action figure? with the army? navy? air force? marines? all of them at once? it’s not possible for one man/toy? to endure so much training, so much violence, and the (g.i.) is a lie, hasbro is my creator, not the government or god, so confusing, real american hero, what bunk, in comic books and on tv, all of that is me making money? inspiration for young boys to grow up and kill? please help, i’m so distraught, born in 1964, then vietnam, iraq, afghanistan, how many men now have ptsd because of me?
Trying Out For Colby Water Polo
i was an athlete, six feet, maybe 190, kinda husky, remembered water polo in high school, we played in five feet of water, i liked pushing guys around, throwing the ball into the net, polk, you should come out and play with us, the colby captain said to me one night, yeah, i thought, i can play division III water polo, the first practice was two days later, i borrowed a speedo and headed down to the pool, ok fellas, we will start with 20 laps, at this moment i should have walked away, i had never swam more than a couple laps in my life, but i was too embarrassed, so i got in, labored through 7 exhausting laps, then quietly exited the water, went to the locker room, put on my clothes, and pretended the whole thing never happened.
September 22, 2023 or Writing Exercise #2
scroll, read, scroll, poem of the day, suzi garcia, her sentences are not quite for me, so i search for words, tulle, doyenne, melliflous, nothing connects, just esoteric ink on a screen, survey surroundings, dark parking garage, in the distance, corepower yoga next to scandinavian designs, sweat and furniture, both closed, friday night in san mateo, sitting because it hurts to walk, same old song, reminds me of motown music, the 60’s used to be yesterday, like dancing to the Four Tops at family parties, now motown is dirt, as in, old as, i’m less young too, new phase of life for sure, i’m the old guy waiting in the car, writing on my iphone, trying to tell the truth.
Daniel W. Polk 